Flights of Fancy: A New Low for Zagat

Sometimes, we are thrown a slow lob over the ol' Lalique plate and the pitch is so simple that we don't know how to hit it; taking the swing is like using your seven iron to hit a volleyball off a tee.
This is the case today.
Insert your own jokes after reading the following.
So, USA Today, expanding beyond their default position as Cliff Notes for the Times, commissioned Tim and Nina to conduct a little survey of best airport dining in the states. (Yo, Zagats, y'all need to chilll! First the stickers in Starbucks, then the Time Warner Center Guide, now this... When will it end? I regret the rambling, but restraint is not a strong point. Do you guys really need the paycheck that badly? Are you going to invoke the Barry Bonds 1st and 15th defense? I've seen your house on Iron Chef and it looked like you were doing just fine!)
Regardless, the exact parameters require the restaurant be situated within a twelve minute drive of an airport. (Very practical, as I generally rent a cars during layovers; no, wait, I'm from Manhattan and I don't drive!) New York is represented by Queens staples, Don Peppe, La Via Pizzeria, Trattoria, and Agnotti. Newark also makes the list, but it's really best if you took a gander yourself.
The List
The Article