Wine Writing, Part Two

Wine Reviews Continued...

The immediate question surrounding the use of these specific registers is simply, “Why?” The query is the easiest portion of the project to address, bordering on self-explanatory. In France and Italy, wine is a staple, considered part of a way of life, but in the US and England, wine is relegated to the realm of luxury goods. Clearly, the invocation of the terminology devoted to other luxury goods, i.e. automobiles and horses is no coincidence. As for the preponderance of sexual phrases in American writing, we can simply state, “Sex sells.” Further, we must keep in mind that the products are inherently sensual and the American phraseology may be crass, but perhaps we do not quite fathom the distinction across the pond.

The next step is a closer read of the writing. Let us take a few reviews as samples for analysis. At random, I pulled the October 15, 1999 issue of WS off of my shelf and turned to their millennial champagne guide. In the sidebar, the publication picked Charles Heidsieck’s Brut Rose Champagne, 1985 as their top selection, and awarded the bubbly a score of 96 out of 100. The text reads, “What a wonderful rose. Puts it all together, with lively balance, creamy texture and lingering finish.” The most striking aspect of this write-up is the utter lack of information provided.

For the sake of discussion, I shall label the frst sentence, Lexia I and the following, Lexia II. Lexia I informs the reader that the writer considers the product “wonderful,” a condition that we have surmised via the numeric ratings. Then, we are reminded that the juice is a rose, a valid insertion as most drinkers do not think blush when they think champagne; yet, we must ponder whether the author is drawing a distinction between rose and champagne. Such a boundary would be technically and practically incorrect, but potentially helpful to Speculum’s readers. The second lexia opens with a shifter of sorts, and we are left to wonder exactly what is put all together. Still, the wine drinker is seeking harmony, and the connotation of the clause is decidedly positive, despite an absence of meaning. Such sentiment is continued through the reference to balance, but the preceding “lively” is curious. Once again, the adjective holds positive connotations, implying, well, life, and once again conjuring thoughts of show dogs, but it does not modify balanced… at all! The notion of a creamy texture is simple and appropriate, and the lingering finish is not specific (dopes it linger for a while?) but the concept is helpful. The choice of “lingering” triggers a subconscious reaction reminding the audience of lingerie, which is always nice.

Sadly, the review does not give us a feel for the wine! Oenophiles tend to break down their notes into color, concentration, nose, taste, and finish…

To Be Continued Once More…